Its been said that the biggest cause of depression is "Unmet expectations"... and I can't disagree with that, but on the flip side, what causes "Unmet expectations?"
I believe unmet expectation a most often caused by a lack of communication.
Today my wife and I spent 20 minutes just trying to communicate the meaning of two sentences... The one SHE thought I was saying, and the one I thought I was saying.
Likewise, I just had a conversation with someone that I am entirely certain didn't understand what I was trying to communicate. The person was very offended and upset when, I believe, had they understood, they would have laughed at the very thought of what I was trying to communicate.
Continuing the examples, communication seems to be the #1 problem up and down the food chain in my company... In fact, I've never seen a company that didn't struggle to communicate inside their hierarchy.
In my infinite, well thought out and planned way, I will answer the question that I have indirectly left hanging, "How do we communicate better so that we are communicating better?"
Answer: I DON'T KNOW!!! When you figure it out, tell me.
Friday, December 21, 2007
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Holiday Spirit
The last few weeks I have made a concerted effort to be full of Holiday cheer.
I remember several years ago feeling "the magic" or "the Holiday Spirit" so strongly that I knew that Christmas changed the heart of people for a few simple weeks a year to truly improve mankind.
Since that Christmas, I've succumb to the "rat race"... Present, cards, gifts, commerce, etc. The Holiday's has been a time to fight back and try not to go crazy worrying about getting "enough" or "good enough" presents for the myriad of people who I'm supposed to give gifts to.
This year things are more complicated than ever. I now actually have a child of my own who I don't want to feel that she does without. The pocketbook isn't as loose because Lisa isn't working any more, and my workload has only increased exponentially in the past 6 months.
Oddly enough, it was a combination of my daughter's innocents, and commercialism that have driven me to my current euphoria.
December 1st we went tree shopping, on December 2nd we put the lights on the tree and decorated the house. That night as we tried to put our little lightning bolt to bed, was walked her through the house... Lights off, intending to show her "See, Sarah, the house is saying 'ni-night' to you." I met with the all to common realization that Little Sarah was teaching me that night. She put her head against my chest, but she didn't sleep. She stared in wonder at the hundreds of tiny lights that graced our plant shelves, mantel, and tree. she was caught up in the nutcracker, and Christmas dolls that adorn our house. She felt the wonder that I had lost.
I resolved that night to lay aside the things that get in the way of the magic. Lisa and Sarah have been my focus. We have made a wreath as a family, shopped together, laughed together, watched Christmas movies, played games, sang carols. Every night I find myself rushing home excited to see what we've got planned for tonight.
I'm finding it more fun to hold hands with Lisa, to stand outside and look at our house and its "light bill suicide". How can you want to do anything than spread that magic?
I remember several years ago feeling "the magic" or "the Holiday Spirit" so strongly that I knew that Christmas changed the heart of people for a few simple weeks a year to truly improve mankind.
Since that Christmas, I've succumb to the "rat race"... Present, cards, gifts, commerce, etc. The Holiday's has been a time to fight back and try not to go crazy worrying about getting "enough" or "good enough" presents for the myriad of people who I'm supposed to give gifts to.
This year things are more complicated than ever. I now actually have a child of my own who I don't want to feel that she does without. The pocketbook isn't as loose because Lisa isn't working any more, and my workload has only increased exponentially in the past 6 months.
Oddly enough, it was a combination of my daughter's innocents, and commercialism that have driven me to my current euphoria.
December 1st we went tree shopping, on December 2nd we put the lights on the tree and decorated the house. That night as we tried to put our little lightning bolt to bed, was walked her through the house... Lights off, intending to show her "See, Sarah, the house is saying 'ni-night' to you." I met with the all to common realization that Little Sarah was teaching me that night. She put her head against my chest, but she didn't sleep. She stared in wonder at the hundreds of tiny lights that graced our plant shelves, mantel, and tree. she was caught up in the nutcracker, and Christmas dolls that adorn our house. She felt the wonder that I had lost.
I resolved that night to lay aside the things that get in the way of the magic. Lisa and Sarah have been my focus. We have made a wreath as a family, shopped together, laughed together, watched Christmas movies, played games, sang carols. Every night I find myself rushing home excited to see what we've got planned for tonight.
I'm finding it more fun to hold hands with Lisa, to stand outside and look at our house and its "light bill suicide". How can you want to do anything than spread that magic?
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Holiday Cheer
Today I have to be glad that my readership is dedicated to no more than 4 loyal readers and very few other infrequent readers.
Yesterday was the big "Get Christmas Going!!!" day in the Miller home... I mean, THE WORKS!!! The Tree shopping, lights on the house, decorations, holly berries, pine cones, window decor.. You name it.
It wasn't such an expensive day because we bought everything last year, right??? RIGHT!!!! (Read in the Sarcasm).
After putting up everything from last year... We had to put in "what we didn't but Wanted to put in last year"... Two new strings of lights, a power cord, and various odds and ends later, we started on a new WREATH(?!!!)
The holiday's NEVER are without new additions.
So, the HUNT: (Here is where I'm glad my readership is small).
Lisa and I didn't have a christmas tree our first Christmas married... With a wopping income of $400 a month, and rent of $460, (Not to mention groceries, gas, and miscellaneous expense), we felt it wouldn't be prudent to buy a tree. So instead we bought 1 string of Christmas lights and made the shape of a christmas tree (with tape to hold the lights in place) on the wall of our one bedroom apartment. MAN DO I MISS POVERTY!!!!
On year two Lisa and I recalled the dreaded 6 hour hunt for a Christmas tree, an old Chidsey tradition that sounds neat until you realize that the Chidsey Family lives in Downtown SANDY UTAH!!!! We aren't talking about treking up the mountains to find the perfect specimen of Christmas... No, just trapsing in and out of the minivan going from tree lot to tree lot and arguing the fullness, price, and size of every tree in the lot... Only to finally get so cold you just "Point and Pay" so you can get your grumpy self back to the house and try to warm up before you die of hypothermia.
Lisa and I dedicated ourselves to the "One stop, HAPPY SHOP"... That is to say, we buy at the ONLY tree lot we stop at, and we try to keep "Jack Frost's nipping" down to a 20 minute ordeal (that includes cutting and strapping).
We made an exception this year by visiting a second, LARGER tree lot owned and operated by the same people as the first tree lot we visited this year... (Same ownership is our excuse for visiting local #2).
Still, at 10.5 minutes we had a tree picked out and we argued "Are you sure that will fit in our front room, Bill?"
"Sure, its the same price, size, shape, and fullness as the tree we got last year"
So, strap it, mortgage your first born, and off to hot cocoa we go...
When we got it into the house, it was 1.333 times the price, 1.333 times the size, and 1.333 times the fullness of last years tree... (Did I mention that it's GORGEOUS????)
So, I don't have a front room this year, but Christmas will be HAPPY anyway.
By the time we finished yesterday, I had the frostbite, the lights, the tree, the bankruptcy filing, and a WHOLE LOAD OF CHRISTMAS CHEER!!!!
Yesterday was the big "Get Christmas Going!!!" day in the Miller home... I mean, THE WORKS!!! The Tree shopping, lights on the house, decorations, holly berries, pine cones, window decor.. You name it.
It wasn't such an expensive day because we bought everything last year, right??? RIGHT!!!! (Read in the Sarcasm).
After putting up everything from last year... We had to put in "what we didn't but Wanted to put in last year"... Two new strings of lights, a power cord, and various odds and ends later, we started on a new WREATH(?!!!)
The holiday's NEVER are without new additions.
So, the HUNT: (Here is where I'm glad my readership is small).
Lisa and I didn't have a christmas tree our first Christmas married... With a wopping income of $400 a month, and rent of $460, (Not to mention groceries, gas, and miscellaneous expense), we felt it wouldn't be prudent to buy a tree. So instead we bought 1 string of Christmas lights and made the shape of a christmas tree (with tape to hold the lights in place) on the wall of our one bedroom apartment. MAN DO I MISS POVERTY!!!!
On year two Lisa and I recalled the dreaded 6 hour hunt for a Christmas tree, an old Chidsey tradition that sounds neat until you realize that the Chidsey Family lives in Downtown SANDY UTAH!!!! We aren't talking about treking up the mountains to find the perfect specimen of Christmas... No, just trapsing in and out of the minivan going from tree lot to tree lot and arguing the fullness, price, and size of every tree in the lot... Only to finally get so cold you just "Point and Pay" so you can get your grumpy self back to the house and try to warm up before you die of hypothermia.
Lisa and I dedicated ourselves to the "One stop, HAPPY SHOP"... That is to say, we buy at the ONLY tree lot we stop at, and we try to keep "Jack Frost's nipping" down to a 20 minute ordeal (that includes cutting and strapping).
We made an exception this year by visiting a second, LARGER tree lot owned and operated by the same people as the first tree lot we visited this year... (Same ownership is our excuse for visiting local #2).
Still, at 10.5 minutes we had a tree picked out and we argued "Are you sure that will fit in our front room, Bill?"
"Sure, its the same price, size, shape, and fullness as the tree we got last year"
So, strap it, mortgage your first born, and off to hot cocoa we go...
When we got it into the house, it was 1.333 times the price, 1.333 times the size, and 1.333 times the fullness of last years tree... (Did I mention that it's GORGEOUS????)
So, I don't have a front room this year, but Christmas will be HAPPY anyway.
By the time we finished yesterday, I had the frostbite, the lights, the tree, the bankruptcy filing, and a WHOLE LOAD OF CHRISTMAS CHEER!!!!
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